It's what's on the inside that counts...so they say.

Well, I've accomplished one of my goals for this year. I have been slowly losing weight since January. I've lost a total of about 18 pounds. Give or take a smidgen. Ultimately you'd think I've done really good and since I'm at the weight I want to be at, you'd think I'd be ecstatic. But I'm not. I mean I'm happy that I'm at my goal weight. I'm happy that I finally fit into my "skinny" jeans. I'm happy that people have noticed and that my hard work has paid off.

So why am I still not happy with the I look? Honestly, I look in the mirror or at pictures and I still see the fat me. And I know this is not healthy. Don't get me wrong, I'm not anorexic. I eat and I would love to eat more. But I don't. My self control keeps things in check. Let me tell you, some times it's hard too.
How do I get rid of that fat me? Do I lose ten more pounds and see what happens then? What if I'm still not happy? Another ten pounds? What if it's not a physical thing? Do I need therapy? WTF?

I guess in conclusion, I will just try to lose ten more pounds. If I'm not happy by then, I think I'll know it's in my head. I know that if I lose any more then that I will start to look unhealthy. We'll see what happens...